You might think you’re awesome sometimes and you’d do everything according to the books, you’d always smile, you’re always polite, always opening doors and what not but people still have issues with you and you don’t know why. I personally believe being a people pleaser isn’t all that cool but people liking you isn’t bad either. Here are 5 little things that you probably do that make people uncomfortable around you.
1. ALWAYS HUMBLE BRAGGING
There’s a thing called “humble-bragging,” it’s when people self-deprecate, but are actually showing off or bragging. For example, you could call yourself weak after going to the gym, but you’re actually trying to call attention to your fitness. It seems clever, but a lot of people can see through it. Used on occasion, it’s funny. Used constantly, it’s aggravating. What makes this practice irritating is not just the bragging, but that it’s an attempt at deception. Whether you meant to or not, you’re indicating that you think you can trick someone. Being proud of your accomplishments is OK—trying to make yourself the center of attention through trickery is not.
2. PRESSING YOUR PHONE DURING A CONVERSATION
When you’re in a business meeting, it’s important to give the participants your full attention. Nothing changes the tone of a meeting or conversation faster than checking your phone. Even a quick glance can make other parties feel unimportant or ignored. All of a sudden, what could’ve been a smooth conversation becomes awkward, even impossible. If you must check your phone, inform participants of this ahead of time. Let them know why you’re checking it and stress its importance.
3. BEING CLOSED MINDED
Closed minded people aren’t willing to accept new ideas, which by nature means a conversation can’t happen. Being closed off makes you inflexible and unable to adapt to new changes in the industry. Remember that this doesn’t make you a bad person, but it does mean you need to change. Try viewing things from other people’s perspectives. Remember that understanding another person’s viewpoint or valuing his or her opinion doesn’t mean you have to believe the same thing or even condone it. It just means you have to make an effort to understand him or her.
In business, who you know is as important as what you know. However, problems can come up when all you do is drop names. Using every interaction as an opportunity to call out names is not only pretentious but annoying, and people can and will easily interpret it as insecurity. It also cheapens the conversation as a whole and can keep people from listening to the rest of what you have to say. Ironically, people shy away from those who demand or are desperate for attention. More often than not, all you need is to be considerate and friendly. They’ll be more interested in who you are and what you do instead of who you know.