1. Everywhere seems far: The places you could normally go hundred times to and fro on a non-diarrhea day would suddenly become as far as heaven when your stomach suddenly cramps up. Sometimes, it feels like it will rush out of your anus without your permission, if you do not get a place fast.
2. Everywhere seems clean: On a non-diarrhea day, you would never sit on a toilet bowl without first disinfecting it and viewing it with a microscope to make sure that all the bacteria are dead. But, when that shitty feeling comes, the only thing on your mind is how to get it out fast without soiling your pants. You only realize how dirty the place is after you are done with the business.
3.Things take longer: Something as fast as bringing your tissue paper put in your purse on a normal day becomes as if there is a superior being with a remote turning every moment in slow motion. Even opening the toilet door with your best speed doesn’t seem fast enough.
4.Every joke is dry: Something that would have cracked you up so easily on a normal day would not only annoy you but almost want to make you give the joker a punch in the face. Although you wouldn’t want to because you might just explode everywhere and that wouldn’t be good.
5.No farting: Because you are not sure which it is, on a diarrhea day, the only time you are allowed to fart is when you are sitting comfortably on the toilet unless of course you want to update your ‘most embarrassing moment’ journal.