Stop pretending that you’re footloose and fancy-free; easygoing, free and easy, common, it is time for some ruthless stocktaking
1. You ghost on people
You’ve been single for so long that there is a sense of detachment and self-sufficiency. But ghosting on dates (without a legitimate reason) gives out a signal that you’re fickle, you’re flaky, you’re inexperienced in starting and ending matters of the heart.
Corrective measures: Keep communication channels open, unless you’re being stalked.
2. You’re ‘happy’ to be single
The ladies’ night cosmopolitans are best seen on TV. Stop consuming them in reality. Or that raucous boys’ night out at some godforsaken pub must be hilarious every once in a while. But at no point should you kid yourself that it beats the real thing: being in a serious relationship. Most people who say that they’re happy to be single are lying. Don’t be one of them. Truth is good for the soul.you’re unhappy. You need someone.find someone.
It’s rather simple, start dating.
3. You’re waiting for the perfect guy(and he ain’t coming)
Ok, we all are harboring that secret wish for the perfect guy. But he ain’t coming. Stop slobbering over unrealistic dreams. It’s wasting your time, and you could well be missing crucial opportunities
Corrective measures: Get real. Stop daydreaming
4. You have issues with intimacy
This can go either way. Either you’re too shy, or you’re too eager. Not even going as far as a kiss or holding hands gives your date/potential lover the sign that you’re not interested. On the other hand, jumping on your date is sheer desperation. Balance your carnal urges and find the right algorithm between lust and caution.
Corrective measures: Learn to trust and to let go too.
5. You’re married to the job
Nothing can be worse than hiding behind your job to fill the void. By all means, be a careerist, but don’t let that come at the cost of your love life. Please use your work colleagues to introduce you to potential dates.
Corrective measures: Find a balance between work and personal life.
6. Your friends are cooler than your dates
Of course, it is lovely to have a set of cool, intelligent best friends forevers. But is it ironically also scuppering your hopes for finding love? Sometimes, we’re so sorted socially that we don’t look further afield. Don’t dump your besties, but start socializing in different spaces, by which you can find interesting people.
Corrective measures: Friends don’t make up for the lack of a partner. Split your social calendar to accommodate both.
7. You like your old monk and soda, alone
In the course of being single, have you also begun enjoying your own company a little too much? If so, it’s a problem. But do take the initiative to still be in the game. If invited by friends, make the effort to go out.
Corrective measures: (Most) people don’t bite. Circulate.