Your period of mourning your previous relationship is no more. So you’re ready to start dating again and meet the person of your dreams. But are you really over him or her?
1. The thoughts of your ex don’t dominate you mind or conversation.
2. You are no longer on an emotional roller coaster regarding your ex. Your mood swings and emotional highs and lows have subsided.
3. You no longer stalk your ex’s social media accounts. Actually, you are finally ready to unfriend and unfollow their pages.
4. It’s been several weeks since you’ve rewound every moment of your relationship, trying to determine what went wrong.
5. You aren’t waiting on a phone call or text from your ex, wanting to see you or get back together.
6. The thought of your ex with someone else doesn’t upset you.
7. You deleted and/or blocked your ex’s number and cut off all communication; not out of anger but out of a healthy need to move on with your life.
8. You don’t try to manipulate your relationship with mutual friends or your ex’s family to gain intel on your ex’s activities.
9. Running into your ex in public doesn’t make you nervous, instead it makes you realize you are better off without them.
10. You’ve gone out with friends, been on a few dates and you are finally opening yourself to the possibilities of meeting someone new.
11. Your emotions aren’t moved by sentimental items or memories from the relationship. You acknowledge those memories as good times and nothing more.
12. When you mention your ex’s name, it doesn’t evoke negative emotions.
13. You stop avoiding places your ex might be.
14. You allow yourself to love again and begin to have feelings for someone else.
15. Seeing people in a relationship, listening to love songs or watching a romantic comedy doesn’t cause tears or disappointment but hope for your next relationship.
And the list goes on… Of course, this isn’t an exhaustive list. But, it is enough to get you started with a relational self-check.
If you find yourself guilty of majority of these issues, you might need a little more healing before dating again. But if you are able to check the box on most of these, you are ready to move forward. When you start dating remember the person you are dating is not your ex. So don’t hold them to the same standards or expectations. Give them a fresh opportunity and a clean slate to start a new relationship with you.