23 Views

Things A Man Must Learn To Avoid Before He Can Be Considered A Mature Adult.

It seems that we as a society have forgotten some important values, and are generally becoming more immature as a result. There doesn’t seem to be a differentiation between manliness and egocentric chauvinist behavior in a lot of people’s minds, which is truly sad. You have people saying things like 30 is the new 20, and grown men acting like entitled spoiled children. The truth is that once you’ve stepped into your mid-20s you should have gained enough life experience to be able to behave like a mature adult.

The thing is, few young people – and too few older people as well, I’m sad to say – don’t really know what it means to be a mature man. A truly mature man is a strong and confident individual, a diligent provider, passionate and caring lover, brave protector, problem solver, careful listener, a safe port in a storm and a friend you can depend on.

Being a confident individual who knows a thing or two about life, understands that others depend on him and has his priorities straight, a mature man will never exhibit behaviors associated with inexperienced, immature and weak people. Here are the things that mature men don’t do.

1. Don’t let fear keep you from achieving happiness and success

Fear – whether it be fear of failure, fear of being reprimanded or fear of being rejected – is something that keeps most men back. Living in fear means being docile and never seizing big opportunities, which can negatively impact your career, love life, interpersonal relationships and mental well-being. A mature man knows that fear is always present, but he knows who to deal with it.

He doesn’t hesitate to put himself out there and take some risks, particularly when the only consequence to taking an action will be a slightly bruised ego or a bit of discomfort. Mature men live on the very edge of their comfort zone and take frequent trips into the wilderness that lies beyond that edge.

2. You don’t go do things just to please others

You often see young guys who start working out to impress girls, men who read up on wine tasting or art just so others perceive them as classy, and you also have those who go out of their way to come across as smart, so that their boss and coworkers will respect them more. Mature men are not motivated by what others think – their actions are motivated by a sincere desire to improve, learn and develop in a direction that they themselves have chosen.

They train to be healthier and stronger, they read books and take classes to expand their knowledge and develop skills in areas that they find useful or interesting. In other words, they know who they are and what they want, and although they respect others’ opinions, they are only governed by what they believe is the best choice.

3. You don’t create an idealized image of a woman in your mind

Many relationships fall apart when immature men realize that the image of the ideal woman that they have put on a pedestal and have been admiring all this time doesn’t really sync up with reality. Many guys go from zealous admiration to misguided misogyny when their deluded expectations aren’t met by real women. Women are just like men – they have their strengths and weaknesses, admirable traits and forgivable faults, desires and fears. A mature man knows this and feels much more at ease with women, seeing them as his equal, and can thus develop sincere and healthy relationships.

4. You don’t get baffled by a woman’s words or actions

Even though mature men treat women as equals, they are aware of the simple fact that men and women are fairly different on a number of levels – e.g. from a biochemical, psychological and social standpoint. We are brought up differently and our brains are wired differently, and a mature man understands that women communicate, argue and are emotionally affected by things differently than men are.

This is why such a man is not easily baffled or angered by a woman’s words or actions, and is more than capable of seeing things from a different perspective and picking up on subtle cues – it’s not about mind reading, just about developing a deeper understanding of the female psyche and body language cues.

5. You don’t hold grudges

Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. – Buddha

Arguments will happen between family members, friends, lovers and coworkers, it is inevitable if you spend a lot of time with someone. However, a clear sign of maturity is the ability to cool off after an argument and let go of all the negative feelings. You will hear the phrases “I’m sorry,” “forgive me, I was wrong to do that,” “oh, just forget about it, it’s nothing, really,” and “water under the bridge” spoken by mature men, as they give and receive apologies and move on with their lives. Harboring resentment will poison your relationships and lead to unhappiness.

6. You don’t feel insecure about your appearance and style

Another big issue many men have is that they feel insecure about the way they look, dress and act. Insecurities lead to fear, anxiety and anger, which will negatively affect your life in many different ways. Insecure men are afraid to experiment with fashion as they don’t want to be considered feminine, and they don’t feel comfortable in their own shoes.

The world has evolved, and fashion sensibilities have drastically changed. There are a number of fashion accessories that can be worn by both sexes, and you don’t even have to sacrifice utility for style. A mature man is confident in his appearance and unique fashion sense, and doesn’t care about a few people disapproving or making negative comments.

7. You don’t distance yourself from your family

As the years go by and we mature, keeping strong family ties becomes more apparent. There are some instances where it is not possible for a family to stay close, but most of us can afford to spend a bit more time with our parents, relatives, wife, and kids. Quality family time strengthens bonds and a mature man sees himself as being part of a larger codependent group.

8. You don’t allow people to bully you

There is a difference between being confrontational and being assertive, and it is not something that immature guys really understand. Mature men have the self-respect, self-control and confidence to set and enforce boundaries – if others try to push too far and bully them, these men will stand their ground and project a strong dominant energy. They cannot be coerced into doing something that they don’t want to do, nor will they sit by and let someone walk all over them. There is no need for them to resort to violence or shouting in most cases, as they can solve problems by standing tall and speaking up for themselves in a strong stern voice.

9. You don’t moan and despair when faced with challenges

Defeatism and moaning are things that a mature man sees no need for, and has no time for. When faced with challenges this type of man will remain collected, even helping calm others and keeping their spirits up, and work on finding the right solution. Often sacrifices have to be made and plenty of hard work put into solving big problems, but this is not something that men should shy away from. It is a simple rule that these men abide by – either put forth a constructive solution or stay quiet until you can find one. This makes the people around them feel safe and stay positive.

10. You don’t see your job as something boring that you have to put up with

While some people just view their jobs as something they need to push through mindlessly, so that they can go home and do what they want, the mature way of going about it is to give your best at your job and look for opportunities to improve and take your career to the next level. Mature men realize that others depend on them, so their career is a very big priority. Constantly improving and striving to earn more so that you can provide for your loved ones and still be able to afford some luxuries that will make you happy – this is the goal that these men set for themselves.

11. You shouldn’t be afraid to take action and make difficult decisions

There will be times in everyone’s life where hard decisions need to be made, and to overcome adversity you often need quick thinking and the ability to take action at the right moment. A mature man will make reservations in advance when he wants to take his date out out, talk to his boss about a promotion opportunity, sit his friends down and talk them out of doing something stupid even if it means that they will get mad at him, put himself in danger to protect his loved ones or sacrifice his comfort to ensure their happiness. This doesn’t mean that mature men always know exactly what to do or have the ability to handle any situation, but they will try to the best of their ability to ensure a favorable outcome.

12. You shouldn’t set unrealistic goals

Some people will often get disappointed and quit because they have set unrealistic goals for themselves, right from the start and are then unable to achieve them. An important aspect of maturity is being able to correctly gauge your capabilities and be honest with yourself, which allows mature men to set more realistic goals. They are patient enough to dedicate themselves to slowly making progress in the long run and understand that the ultimate goal isn’t attaining quick results, but sustainable results.

13. You shouldn’t let your ego get the best of you or act on impulse

In the end, the mark of a truly mature man is his ability to keep his ego under check and actually think things through before doing something. They understand that their actions might have undesired consequences and look past the immediate moment, planning their actions by anticipating what is to come, like an experienced chess player.

For example, they know that going on a shopping spree will put them in dire financial straits come the end of the month or that holding a grudge and starting a fight over little things will only make them feel miserable in the end.

And there you have it – the things that a man must learn not to do before he can be considered a mature adult. No one is perfect, and we could all probably work on some of these things in our own lives, striving to become better men overall.

Get the best viral stories straight into your inbox!

Don't worry, we don't spam

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.

Latest Posts

Dangerous Infections You Can Get When You Bite Your Nails
Food and Health
33 views
Food and Health
33 views

Dangerous Infections You Can Get When You Bite Your Nails

Mabel - September 22, 2017

Biting your nails might seem like a minor bad habit. The frequency of the habit might lead you to believe that it's no big deal. However, it…

The University Of Ibadan Fixes Resumption Date
General
29 views
General
29 views

The University Of Ibadan Fixes Resumption Date

Mabel - September 22, 2017

The management of the University of Ibadan (UI) Chapter returns back to classrooms, the school authority has notified the students that the second semester lectures of the…

2017 WAFU Cup: Super Eagles Defeat Benin To Set Up A Final Game Against Ghana
Sports
39 views
Sports
39 views

2017 WAFU Cup: Super Eagles Defeat Benin To Set Up A Final Game Against Ghana

Mabel - September 22, 2017

The home based Super Eagles of Nigeria on Thursday advanced top the final of the 2017 WAFU  Cup of Nations defeating  Benin 1-0 in Cape Coast in the…

Checkout Photos Of Nigerian Writer, Chimamanda Adichie’s Husband
Romance and Love
44 views
Romance and Love
44 views

Checkout Photos Of Nigerian Writer, Chimamanda Adichie’s Husband

Mabel - September 22, 2017

Photos of popular Nigerian writer, Chimamanda Adichie and her husband Dr. Ivara Esege have been celebrated on social media. The husband of the award-winning Nigerian writer, Chimamanda…

Ooni Of Ife All Smiles In New Photos As He Attends Event In Abuja
General
32 views
General
32 views

Ooni Of Ife All Smiles In New Photos As He Attends Event In Abuja

Mabel - September 22, 2017

The Ooni of Ife, is definitely in a delightful mood as he was photoed recently following reports of his estrangement to Wuraola Zynab Otiti some weeks back.…

9 Health Benefits Of Sour-Sop Fruit
Food and Health
46 views
Food and Health
46 views

9 Health Benefits Of Sour-Sop Fruit

Mabel - September 22, 2017

Sour-sop is a wonder-working fruit found in the tropical regions of the world. Around the world, it is known with different names such as Graviola, Brazilianawpaw, custard…

How PDP Can Return To Power In 2019
Politics
32 views
Politics
32 views

How PDP Can Return To Power In 2019

PH - September 22, 2017

A former Minister of Education, Prof. Tunde Adeniran, has predicted that the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) would return to power in 2019. According to him, the party…

What Some Devils in APC are Doing to Frustrate President Buhari – Katsina Governor
Politics
38 views
Politics
38 views

What Some Devils in APC are Doing to Frustrate President Buhari – Katsina Governor

PH - September 22, 2017

The Governor of Katsina State, Aminu Bello Masari, has alleged that some “devils” have infiltrated the All Progressives Congress, APC, with the aim of “pitching the electorate…

What IPOB, Nnamdi Kanu Should Do About Proscription
Politics
29 views
Politics
29 views

What IPOB, Nnamdi Kanu Should Do About Proscription

PH - September 22, 2017

Vice President of the Nigerian Bar Association, NBA, Monday Ubani has called on the Indigenous People of Biafra, IPOB, to challenge its proscription in a competent court…

President Muhammadu Buhari Now In London
Politics
35 views
Politics
35 views

President Muhammadu Buhari Now In London

Mabel - September 22, 2017

Nigerian President who departed New York from the 72nd UN General Assembly for the United Kingdom has arrived safely, Femi Adesina, the Special Adviser on Media and Publicity…

What Oritsefemi’s Wife, Nabila Said About Her Mother-In-Law Is Thought-provoking
Entertainment
35 views
Entertainment
35 views

What Oritsefemi’s Wife, Nabila Said About Her Mother-In-Law Is Thought-provoking

MT - September 22, 2017

Nigerian singer Oritsefemi recently shared a photo of his mother and wife, Nabila, together, and their resemblance was is overwhelming. Nabila then reacted after re-sharing the photo via her…

Video: Watch Mayorkun Refuting Reports That His ‘Mama’ Song Was A Copy Of Davido’s ‘Fall’
Entertainment
31 views
Entertainment
31 views

Video: Watch Mayorkun Refuting Reports That His ‘Mama’ Song Was A Copy Of Davido’s ‘Fall’

MT - September 22, 2017

  DMW artiste Mayorkun has responded to claims that his hit song “Mama” was a copy of Davido’s hit song “Fall” with similar beats. According to him, people shouldn’t be fast to judge as they…

Actress Eniola Badmus Finally Forgives Davido’s Babymama: ‘Go And Sin No More…..’
Entertainment
39 views
Entertainment
39 views

Actress Eniola Badmus Finally Forgives Davido’s Babymama: ‘Go And Sin No More…..’

MT - September 22, 2017

  Eniola Badmus has finally forgiven Sophia Momodu, and this comes days after the mother of Davido’s daughter took to SnapChat to body-shame the actress. It all…

Peter Okoye Goes Solo? Read His Latest Tweet Here.
Entertainment
47 views
Entertainment
47 views

Peter Okoye Goes Solo? Read His Latest Tweet Here.

MT - September 22, 2017

  Amidst speculations that the PSquare twin brothers, Paul and Peter Okoye are fighting again, Peter has unveiled his solo Youtube channel. Peter Okoye announced on his…

Kemi Olunloyo Directly Shades Tonto Dike’s Estranged Husband Churchill – “You Can Hang Out With 2000 Women”
Entertainment
54 views
Entertainment
54 views

Kemi Olunloyo Directly Shades Tonto Dike’s Estranged Husband Churchill – “You Can Hang Out With 2000 Women”

MT - September 22, 2017

Miss Kemi Olunloyo in her pursuit for a no domestic violence society, addressed Tonto Dikeh’s ex husband Oladunni Churchill in a recent post on her IG. According…

Top 10 Nigerian Artistes That Have Lost Their Musical Touch, Do You Agree With The List?
Entertainment
39 views
Entertainment
39 views

Top 10 Nigerian Artistes That Have Lost Their Musical Touch, Do You Agree With The List?

MT - September 22, 2017

Undoubtedly the Nigerian music industry is west Africa’s biggest depot of young/old talented, creative, successful and wealthy musical artist that have taking the art of singing music…

Triple MG boss, Ubi Franklin Did The Unthinkable For One His Female Staff, Nicole.
Entertainment
30 views
Entertainment
30 views

Triple MG boss, Ubi Franklin Did The Unthinkable For One His Female Staff, Nicole.

MT - September 22, 2017

Triple MG boss, Ubi Franklin shared this Photos of his female staff, Nicole who was proposed to by a lady in his Abuja office. Her boyfriend sent…

See Why You Could Be Beaten Black And Blue In Ondo State If You Mention Or Defend Asiwaju Tinubu’s Name
Politics
65 views
Politics
65 views

See Why You Could Be Beaten Black And Blue In Ondo State If You Mention Or Defend Asiwaju Tinubu’s Name

MT - September 22, 2017

The mention or the defense of the name of the celebrated national leader of the APC, in the person of Asiwaju Bola Ahmed Tinubu, the Jagaban of…

Loading...