1. Why people think it’s OK to ask you why you’re single.

What the fuck kind of question is this?
2. Couples who ask you to accompany them on their date.

To be the third wheel? No thanks, I’m OK…
3. People who are constantly trying to hook you up with their other single friends.

Let me guess, the thing we have in common is that we’re both single?
4. People suggesting ways of meeting people, as if you haven’t already tried them.

I have this thing called Google…
5. Phrases like, “You’ll find someone when you least expect it,” or, “It’ll happen when you don’t even want it!”

That sounds terrible? Why would I want to find a relationship at exactly the point I don’t want one?
6. People who think saying things like, “Don’t worry, you’re still so young,” would be even a little bit comforting.

I wasn’t worried, but thanks??
7. People who assume you’re being picky, when in reality you’re just refusing to settle.

8. People who think it’s appropriate to ask about your plans for kids.

This is incredibly personal and we literally just met!!!!
9. Or people who ask for your sex life details because they’ve been in an LTR for years.

Yes, casual dating is fun, but that’s all the info you’re getting.
10. People who assume you aren’t in a relationship because you’re focusing on your career.

So everyone else in a relationship is actually terrible at their jobs?
11. People who assume you’re even looking for a relationship.

Actually, no, my life as-is is pretty solid!
12. People who talk about how sad it is to sleep alone.
Yeah riiiiiiight, this bed is all mine.
13. When people try to make you feel better by telling you that you’re such a catch.

As if you don’t already know.
14. And when people feel sorry for you because you’re single…

Why? It’s actually pretty damn great.