1. Confidence is the ability to act from your inner authority
Confident people make decisions from their inner authority, regardless of the outcome or consequences. This doesn’t mean they are immoral or unethical — it’s actually far from it.
Confident people have a respect for others, including themselves. They show it by taking action from their true instincts, not from expectations. If they do go with the grain, they check in with their inner authority first.
Lesson: Check in with yourself before making decisions. Avoid getting caught up in trying to please others by saying the “right” thing or being the “right” kind of person.
Speak what you know to be true under all circumstances. You have the strength to manage any opposition.
2. Confidence is the ability to feel safe being vulnerable
Acting tough actually connotes weakness of character. Confident people are not afraid to express their fears, tell others when they are hurt and let people know about their deeper ambitions, dreams and hopes.
Confident people can show their soft underbellies without fear. Those who lack confidence do all they can to deny their “weakness” and hide it in dark corners of their hearts and minds.
But, someone who is truly self-assured knows the judgment of others or the disappointments of life will never define them. They would never give up their power to outside forces.
Lesson: Allow yourself to be exposed. Cry if you’re in pain, express your authentic disappointments and let others in on the real you. Avoid locking up your heart; it isn’t necessary. Your underbelly is an asset.
3. Confidence is dressing to impress yourself
Confident people tend to look confident. They accept that we live in a visual world and use this to their advantage. They appreciate the reality of their physical body types and dress it accordingly.
Not trying to hide features, they wear clothes that fit, highlight assets and make statements. Not trying to overcompensate, they avoid baring a distracting amount of skin. Confident people dress to express their real selves.
Lesson: Dress yourself as if you’re the lead character in your own smash hit movie. Be real about your body; accept its unique beauty and human flaws. Honor your physical self by adorning it joyfully. Allow others to see you. Stand tall.
4. Confidence is having the strength to remain enthusiastic
Hate, criticism, negativity and disapproval of others are cheap expressions from a person who needs to bolster his or her own weak sense of self.
It is easy to turn “cool” and pessimistic in order to protect against disappointment. Confident people don’t need these strategies; they are able to maintain a youthful sense of joy about life.
If disappointments come their way, they know they can handle them. There’s no need to preempt tragedy. Confident people keep their excitement about life intact, regardless of circumstances or events.
Lesson: Show confidence by being bravely enthusiastic. Let others witness your joy, excitement and delight. Avoid protecting yourself with cynicism. Love fully.
5. Confidence is being on your own path
Confident people know and feel that their lives have purpose. They use their talents, explore their interests and are engaged with the world in a way that reflects their authentic values.
Because they genuinely love the lives they’ve built for themselves, they don’t need others to provide them with a feeling of value and meaning.
This keeps them centered and self-reliant. They will connect with people who enhance their experiences and remove those who block them from walking their paths.
Lesson: Build confidence by living your values. If you hate your job, take action toward finding work you believe in. Consciously make friends who inspire you. Engage in life-enhancing hobbies.
Take pride in the specific way you walk your path. When your life has worth, you feel self-worth. Self-worth equals self-confidence.