7 reasons why you should hate Nigeria


Having travelled the world, you get a pretty fair view on how fascinating some countries and the cultures they carry can be. In the spirit of repartee and with a pinch of salt,, Africa’s largest hotel booking portal presents 7 reasons why you should take a second look at the most populous black nation in the world.


1. Because their men are great lovers

Ever been kissed by a Nigerian man? They smile at you and you are hooked! There is no actual word for their form of kissing but it’s akin to having your lips plugged to a suction pipe, an embrasser avec la langue of sorts which leaves you coming back for more.


 2. Because we’ve been allowed to believe that Nigerian women can’t get slim

Current diet books claim that Nigerian women are chubby because they eat only fresh beef, all day. However, the truth is that their obesity rates are lower than other parts of the continent and they feed on a diet rich in fiber. The fact that Agbani Darego went on to win the Miss World pageant in 2001 is further proof.


3. They have no chill for wildlife, too

All flying and crawling creatures are for food in this country. In 2015, millions of chickens and goats are force-fed with grass in order to produce enough meat for a single meal. Heck, there’s a part of Nigeria where dogs are considered a delicacy. How adventurous is that?!


4. Because they love humour

Have you heard a Nigerian laugh before? Utter bliss! Before the Revolution, the French invented the word l’esprit, which means ‘wit’, but the term “humour” had no comparison until this group of people were created. At the slightest tickle, they burst in rib-racking laughter with mirth bubbling from their belly. No wonder they are called the happiest people on the planet.


5. And they think their cooking is the best in the world

Nigerian’s version of a gourmet meal is a delight to eat. They boast of 5-star multichain hotels with international standard chefs and when the platter is served, the dishes are large enough to cater to a football team. Who knows, maybe this is what makes their dishes so popular. Coincidence, yeah?


6. Because they love Fela

In 1969, Fela went on tour of the United States as the first authentic black musician to play in 10 American cities. His fame did not stop there. With his quick tongue and witty disposition, he soon became a primary target of the military regime he fought against. Although, he died of AIDS and had a heavy drug problem, Fela’s music went platinum long before African music gained global recognition.

7. And they hate rock ‘n’ roll

At least most of them do. It’s strange how you see them gyrating to a class of music called afropop, which a lot of rhythm by the way and yet cringe at the sound of metallic rock. Their artistes have won countless awards around the globe and their excitement is infectious…when you are at the club, this is all that matters!


Written by PH

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